middle cyclones and other references

“Pictures of Success” by Rilo Kiley

They say California is a recipe for a black hole,
And I say, I’ve got my best shoes on, I’m ready to go…
These are times that can’t be weathered,
And we have never been back there since then. 

I remember listening to this song a lot right before graduating from high school. I chose somewhat drastically in February of senior year to go to a university halfway across the country; my first serious relationship had ended and the town seemed stale and used up with my old memories. So I left. I started a habit that I became very good at, which was staying in transit, not putting down roots, enjoying anonymity, choosing not to bother with worn out and perfunctory friendships. When Jenny Lewis sings that “we have never been back there since then,” I still get a little bit excited; I still feel the way I felt on all the walks around my neighborhood in senior year, waiting to put as much physical distance between me and my past as possible. 

“Paranoid Android” - Radiohead

Have I ever told you guys the story of how this was playing over the radio when I had my the high-school breakup? More importantly, how it was after I had shown up at my boyfriend’s school for a dinner/movie (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, actually) with a group of our mutual friends? And that after the fact, I found out that he had told them he’d broken up with me before I showed up? And that that must secretly have been the most awkward dinner/movie ever, I just didn’t realize it?

I guess what I’m saying is that I’ve totally had a Leslie Knope break-up. Also, that I think I love ”Paranoid Android” even more with this messed-up emotional history that is now just funny to me. (Disliking Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was never an option.)